Yesterday over coffee with my dear friend and assistant, Colleen, I got some interesting news. Colleen decided that I'm a knitting superhero, Knitgirl, and she is my faithful sidekick, Bobbin. (Get it? Batman and Robin?) I managed to avoid laughing the coffee out through my nose, and thought the idea was delightful.
It makes me wonder about the suit, though. All superheroes have really distinctive suits, and we would have to be no exception. (And amazing bodies, but that's not me...) And would there be a gadget belt to hold notions?
The image in my head is a kind of younger Miss Marple, Agatha Christie's elderly knitting spinster sleuth. I would have a cape, like the old British lady, but rather than look like Batman's, it would be more like Sherlock Holmes', or Red Riding Hood. I'd have a knitting bag, and it would be filled with luxurious needles and yarns, magnificent patterns (by me, of course), and cookies. The gadget belt would not only hold notions, it would make me look thinner, and set off the rest of the outfit perfectly.
Bobbin is a younger, curvy and petite woman, allowing her to wear something more form fitting - a knitted silk t-shirt and vest over some well-fitting jeans, perhaps. Her gadget belt would contain some anti-pilling potion, goggles allowing her to see the fiber of any yarn missing its ball band, and an unlimited Starbucks gift card.
What about the super powers? I would be able to decipher patterns in a single glance, invisibly pick up a dropped stitch, combine cables and lace with perfect tension, and seat sleeves into shoulders so they'll lay smoothly every time. I'd always buy exactly as much yarn as I need; never an extra skein, and never one skein short. I'd be able to untangle the worst mohair knots with ease. Best of all, anything I knitted would be loved by the recipient - always the right fit, color, and style, every time.
We would use these skills to help fellow knitters far and wide get maximum enjoyment out of their craft. Eventually, they would make action figures out of us, and there would be knock-off gadget belts available on eBay. And of course, capes would suddenly be wildly fashionable.
If only we really were knitting superheroes. Alas, today I'll be paying for my coffee, and hoping I bought enough yarn to complete this UFO in my lap. It was fun to dream.